


NOWHERE MAN

by legolastariel



Series: Dad and Da'y [1]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: A little angst, First Kiss, Fluff and humor there too, Friends to Lovers, Kinda sad the first three chapters, M/M, Stick with it - happy ending guaranteed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-05
Updated: 2016-09-09
Packaged: 2018-08-13 04:50:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,028
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7963105
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/legolastariel/pseuds/legolastariel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After the group just arrived in Alexandria, Daryl is having problems adjusting to the life there. </p><p> </p><p>  <i>This place, this town, these people – they could go ahead and tame, mold and <b>change </b>the rest of his group, but not him. Never. They weren’t going to put him in their golden cage, turn him into someone he was not, have him grow fat and lazy like a domesticated cat.</i></p><p> </p><p>And he's got little reason to stay. He's not happy and thinks about leaving, yet something - or someone? - had him stay so far. And that someone realizes that he must <i>do</i> something, fast, before Daryl Dixon may not be part of his life anymore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I dug out my old Beatles' CDs the other day and was inspired by the lovely song "Nowhere Man", which somehow seemed to apply to Daryl just perfectly. 
> 
> Thanks to my wonderful beta staceykc, who took care of my typos once again.
> 
> Thanks for reading and feedback is highly appreciated!

  
**Nowhere Man**   


 

Daryl was sitting on the front porch of the house in Alexandria, that the majority of their group referred to as _home,_ sharpening the knife he was about to skin and gut his latest quarry with _._  
He knew how much everybody hated him doing that right there in his favorite spot of the porch, leaving a gross mess right next to the front door, which was the mere reason why he did it. This place, this town, these people – they could go ahead and tame, mold and _change_ the rest of his group, but not him. Never. They weren’t going to put him in their golden cage, turn him into someone he was not, have him grow fat and lazy like a domesticated cat. He didn’t want to fit in, if that meant having to twist and bend into a shape that wasn’t him. Either they learned to accept him the way he was, or … 

Or what? He had never followed that train of thought beyond this point. 

With a sigh, he dropped the knife next to the two squirrels he had caught that morning and leaned back against the wooden railing of the porch.

There was music inside of the house. Someone obviously managed to get the old record player going and laughter as well as the murmur of voices reached the archer’s ears along with the melody of the Beatles’ “Nowhere Man”.  


  
_ He's a real nowhere man _  
_ Sitting in his nowhere land  
Making all his nowhere plans for nobody _  


There were dishes and glasses clinking in the kitchen as someone was taking care of the mess they left after last night’s dinner. A door slammed shut, followed by Carl’s angry shout to be quiet, because Judith was asleep.   
Daryl shook his head to himself. Only a teenage boy would _yell_ to have people be quiet in order not to wake the baby.    
A shriek from upstairs and another door being slammed shut, accompanied by Rosita’s annoyed “For crying out loud, Eugene”, had a smirk tug at the corners of Daryl’s mouth. Apparently Eugene had marched into the bathroom once more, while Rosita was taking a shower, which did not happen for the first time. The archer couldn’t help wondering, if Eugene was doing that on purpose. Just as he wondered, if Rosita really was as annoyed as she pretended to be. 

Daryl sighed audibly. He loved these people. He really did. They were his group, his family and he would always favor them over the entire crowd of nameless faces that infested this town. Save for the exception of very few of them, he could very well have done without all of those people. There were way too many of them within these walls for his liking.    
Yet although he truly cared for each and every one of his own people, there were too many of them in this house as well. Out there on the road, things were different. Sticking together was a necessity, their only chance to not lose each other on the way and to enlarge their chances of survival. Around here this _sticking together_ started to annoy him to no end.

Although they had been here roughly three months already, the majority of their group was still living together in this house, as though they had to be prepared to pack and run again any day now. Which was unlikely.  
More often than he liked to admit, Daryl caught himself wishing they actually had to.  

The people of Alexandria – they were good people. He was well aware of that. As a matter of fact, he had taken quite a shine to Aaron and Eric, as well as Denise. And these walls around the town meant safety, a place for Judith and Carl to grow up without having to be out there on the road where their lives were in danger every single day. He meant what he had said to Deanna when they first arrived: _“The boy and the baby, they deserve a roof over their head.”_  
That didn’t change the fact that he felt out of sorts here, still. Some days the walls seemed to move in on him and all the people around him smothered him, had him want to just run, fly to a place he could hear himself think and breathe freely again. The only times he felt like himself, was when he was out there hunting or on a recruiting trip with Aaron. Sometimes he wondered, why he kept returning to this place at all.

     _“Nah, ya know why”,_ Daryl thought and couldn’t help another sigh.

Before he could sink deeper into his brooding mood, the front door opened and Maggie and Glenn appeared in the doorway. 

It was clearly visible now that she was pregnant, not only by her swollen belly, but also by the _glow_ that seemed to engulf her, as though her happiness was shining from the inside out. 

Why those two still stayed in this house, was beyond Daryl. Surely Deanna would have given them their own place, if they had asked her. There were still quite a few houses throughout the town unoccupied, and he and Aaron hadn’t been able to find any new residents in quite a while, so a house for the new little Rhee-Greene family shouldn’t have been a problem. Yet Glenn and Maggie had chosen to stay. Just like Eugene. And Rosita. It had been in consideration for her probably, that Sasha and Abraham had opted for getting their own place, rather than living door to door with Abraham’s ex and rubbing their new love into her face on a daily base. But after watching Rosita around Eugene lately, Daryl wondered if she would even have cared at all.   
He was well aware that most people still underestimated him, because he was a loner and he was quiet. But he had eyes. And he had ears. And he wasn’t dumb. He saw and heard far more than they were all aware of. And there was something going on between Rosita and Eugene, although they were trying to hide it. Maybe they weren’t even aware of it themselves yet, but it was _there_ nevertheless.

Carol had understood a long time ago, that whatever she had hoped to be _there_ between herself and Daryl, was clearly not.   
Daryl still felt guilty for never mustering the courage to just tell her straight out that he wasn’t interested – not in her or any other woman for that matter – although her advances couldn’t have been more obvious. He had turned her down politely often enough for her to figure it out on her own, so he had figured. And she had. She had eyes and ears, too. And she wasn’t dumb, either. Even before they’d arrived in Alexandria, she had stopped making passes and following him around like a puppy. Now, with him being friends with Aaron and Eric, as well as Denise and Tara, the reason why he just wasn’t interested in more than friendship, should have been obvious even to someone who wasn’t as smart a lady as she was. It had all fallen into place pretty soon and had her understand just why Daryl circled around Rick like the Earth around the sun. Because Rick was just that to him – his sun, the center of his world, the one person he loved more than anything.   
Daryl was happy for her. She had found someone who loved her dearly and she had moved in with Tobin a while ago. Maybe Daryl even envied her at this point, because she was clearly at least one step ahead of him.

 

Glenn’s voice ended the archer’s train of thought and had him focus on the happy couple in front of him.

     “We were gonna go for a walk to check on the new vegetable plants. Wanna come?”

Daryl arched an eyebrow, while he looked at the young Asian and then the pretty woman next to him.   
They had never before asked him, if he cared to join them on a walk. And they must have been aware of the fact that vegetable plants were far from being top on his list of interests. When he noticed them exchange a quick glance, he was barely able to stifle another sigh. Charity. That’s what this was. They didn’t really _want_ him to accompany them. As a matter of fact, they had probably just asked to be polite, hoping deep down inside though that he would decline.    
Did Rick put them up to this? Or Carol? Bad conscience and the mother hen mode had probably kicked in and had both of them acknowledge that neither one had spared the time for him lately. Thus they had put the rest of the group up to keep him happy, as though he was a five-year-old that needed to be entertained.   
     Daryl’s jaw muscles clenched as he gritted his teeth, while he picked up the knife he had placed next to the squirrels earlier. 

     “Thanks, but I’m busy.”

Maggie’s face distorted in disgust.

     “Gosh, Daryl, do you have to do this on the front porch every time?”

     “Ya want dinner or not?”

     “Sure, and I appreciate you still going out there hunting, although …”

Daryl’s expression darkened.

     “Although?”

She sent another glance to her husband, obviously undecided whether to go on or not. Apparently she had said more than she had intended to already.

     “Although”, Glenn came to her aid, “it isn’t really necessary any longer. Don’t get me wrong, we really do appreciate it, but the Hilltop provides enough food and we were quite successful with …”

     “Them vegetable plants”, Daryl ended the sentence gravely, while dropping the knife. “Ain’t forcing no one ta eat ma squirrels. Used ta hunt them for maself, ‘cause I like ‘em. You rather want the Hilltop’s pasta or yer tomatoes, no sweat.”

Both of them were squirming now as this conversation had taken a rather unpleasant turn.

     “We didn’t mean to …”

     “Hurt ma feelings?” Daryl snorted derisively. “Heard worse in ma life.”

He picked the knife back up to go about gutting said squirrels, when Maggie turned around rather quickly and almost fled from the porch. Glenn answered Daryl’s frown with an apologetic shrug.

     “She gets nauseous quite quickly lately.”

     “Over seeing blood and guts? Man, helluva time to develop a sensitive stomach.” 

Glenn stepped from one foot onto the other.

     “Well, yeah … we’ll be seeing you.”

That said he hurried after his wife, apparently happy to be able to fly.

     “They gotta be kidding me”, Daryl murmured, a dark scowl on his face.

 

Just when he was placing the knife for the first cut, he heard steps approach the house once more and a second later Carol appeared on the porch.

     “Thought I’d find you here”, she said matter-of-factly.

     “Yeah, where else would I be?” he answered more gruffly than he had intended to. “Taking _a walk_ with Glenn and Maggie, ta go look at their precious _vegetables_?”

She arched an eyebrow.

     “What are you talking about?”

     “Never mind. Whadda ya want?” 

     “Came to invite you over to dinner with Tobin and me. I was gonna make some casserole and …”

     “No thanks. I’m good. Got some squirrels. Want one for yer _casserole_?” 

Her features derailed slightly, when she tried not to pull a face, but he noticed nevertheless.

     “Them squirrels not good enough for ya, either?”

The hurt in his inflection was palpable, much that he tried to hide it, and had her cock her head.

     “Of course not. It’s just …”

     “They ain’t needed no longer.”

     “You putting your life in danger out there, hunting, isn’t needed any longer.”

He looked at her for a long moment, deadpan, not saying a word. She meant well, he was aware of that. She always had. But the more she tried to protect him, the more she hovered over him and stuck her nose in his business, the more she pushed him away. 

     “It’s huntin’ and puttin’ ma life in danger out there, that makes me feel alive at all, Carol. Ya never got that, haven’t ya?”  

     “I just don’t want you to pull away again. You’ve come too far.”

Again he just looked at her piercingly, biting his tongue not to say his thoughts out loud. _“I may have come far, but I’ve reached a dead end. Can’t ya see that?”_

What he did say in the end was: “Got some squirrels ta take care of. Was there anything else ya wanted?”

It was her sighing audibly this time.

     “No. If you want to talk or care for some company, you know where to find me.”

     “Sure.”

With a parting nod she wordlessly turned around and slowly walked away, pulling her cardigan tighly around her waist as though she felt chilly all of a sudden. Daryl listened to her steps until they had disappeared around the nearest corner, before he had his back drop back against the railing.

     _“Ya still don’t know me, Carol, do ya? Ain’t the guy who needs ta_ talk _and it ain’t_ yer _company I need.”_

          “Rick.”

He didn’t even know, he had said the name out loud. The name of the one person, he would have wanted to see, who would have been able to lift his spirit and could have driven the clouds away that were darkening his sky more and more. The name of the one person, who was the mere reason he was still here at all.   


  
_ Doesn't have a point of view _  
_ Knows not where he's going to _  
_ Isn’t he a bit like you and me? _  


A few yards away, unseen by the archer, Rick stood with Spencer and Aaron, giving them instructions on sentry duty and wall patrol, while his eyes kept drifting over to his house even while he was talking.  
He had seen Maggie and Glenn emerge and talk to someone sitting in one corner of the porch, right before Carol had showed up and the scenario had been repeated. Rick didn’t even have to make an educated guess as to who it was sitting there in that corner – he _knew._ The same person, the _only_ person, who kept sitting there, day after day, as though it was the only bearable spot in the entire town. And maybe it was. 

     _“Daryl.”_

Rick breathed in deep in order to calm his racing heartbeat. He didn’t have to see his friend to know exactly what he would find, if he walked over to him right now.  
Daryl would be sitting there in the same old rags he’d been wearing for months now, although there was a choice of newer clothes available to all of them, and he would either be gutting his latest quarry or just stare blankly ahead of himself, brooding.  
          The archer did his share of standing sentry or going on patrol along the wall, he still was outside of Alexandria a lot to go on hunting trips or recruiting missions with Aaron and often enough Rick saw him spend time with Judith and Carl, which he was especially thankful for. But other than that, Daryl quite obviously had no intentions of becoming part of this town. Save for Aaron, Eric and Denise, he hadn’t befriended any of the Alexandria residents. He didn’t go to parties or any other kind of gathering, didn’t talk to people he met in the street, even avoided them as far as only possible. And once in a while, he would be just _gone_ , hiding in a secret place he hadn’t even told Rick about, probably to just get away from it all.  
The mere fact that Daryl felt the need to disappear and hide, showed all too clearly that he didn’t like being here. While the rest of their group had settled in quite quickly and enjoyed a somewhat normal life again, Daryl seemed to feel out of sorts a little more with each passing day.  
He rarely ever stayed in his room, although it was the one with the most privacy in the entire house. He opted for sitting on the porch, even at nights sometimes. And many times when Rick had gone on runs with him, he had noticed how Daryl had pulled in a deep breath as soon as they had passed the gate, as though being outside of the walls felt like liberation to the older man, as though only out there he was able to breathe freely.  
While everybody else felt secure inside the walls, Daryl felt _trapped._ There was no sense in denying that. More than once during the past months, Rick had found himself standing at the gate, staring out onto the street when Daryl was out there, waiting. Waiting – and dreading the possibility that his friend would not return. Not because something had happened to him, but because he _chose_ not to come back.

 

          “Rick?”

Aaron’s gentle voice had him focus on the two men standing in front of him again and he cast them an apologetic smile.

          “Sorry, I was just … What did you say?”

          “Just asking, if it’s okay for Spencer to do my shift of sentry duty tonight. It’s Eric’s birthday and I’d like to be  
home …”

Rick cast him another smile and had him fall quiet when he waved the comment off.

          “Sure. If it’s okay with Spencer, you can switch your shifts all you want.”

          “Fine with me”, Spencer said with a shrug, which had Aaron give him a thankful nod.

Rick didn’t pay attention to the two men any longer. After Glenn and Maggie had talked to Daryl rather shortly, only to almost fly from the porch, Carol seemed to have been quickly dismissed as well, because she looked anything but happy as she was walking away just now.  
Obviously it was one of those days again. Actually, _one of those days_ was standard lately as far as Daryl was concerned. He was baring his fangs, pulling away, didn’t even want people of their group around him any longer, save for Carl, Judith and Rick.

          _“You gotta do something, Grimes, and you better do it fast”,_ Rick berated himself secretly.

Daryl needed help. He was close to breaking point and too proud to admit it. Or maybe he felt nobody would understand – or care. Whatever the reason, it was definitely Rick’s turn to make good for all the support and understanding he had gotten from the archer in the past. Because he understood only too well and cared far more than Daryl knew.

 

          “Are you okay?”

Aaron waved his hand before his eyes to get his attention, after his latest words to Rick had obviously not registered once again.

          “Yes, I’m fine”, Rick replied, his inflection slightly annoyed. When he saw the reaction in Aaron’s eyes, he pulled in a deep breath to compose himself. “Sorry. Look, if there isn’t anything else you want to discuss … There’s something, I have to see to.”

Aaron shrugged after exchanging a look with Spencer.

          “No, we’re all set. Be seeing you guys later then.”

Spencer replied something to that, but again Rick didn’t pay attention anymore. He didn’t see the other two go their separate ways, didn’t hear two women wishing him a nice day on their way by, didn’t see Tara wave over to him from where she was sitting on the porch of the infirmary catching some rays. Instead he had taken a few steps towards the house, to be able to peek onto the porch and in that very special corner of it, almost dreading what he would see there.

His assumption had been right. Daryl was there, dressed in his favorite rags and his hair the usual unruly mess, as though still looking the way he did out there during their time on the road had him _feel_ that way, too. Maybe he was trying to preserve a time that, despite of all the danger and hardship they had to go through, had been a happier time for him than the past three months here in Alexandria. Maybe he was afraid to lose himself the way they were all losing themselves to some extent ever since they had gotten here.  
Circumstances and surroundings had their way of taking a toll on people, whether they were aware of it or not. Daryl was well aware of it, had seen every single person of his group change – their appearance, their behavior, their way of acting and thinking, the things they treasured, the people they loved.  
Yet while everybody else was happy about those changes and embraced them as their new life, a _better_ life, Daryl witnessed how his world crumbled and fell apart. Everything and everyone he had held dear was taken away from him or just drifted away, because they adjusted to the new circumstances, whereas Daryl refused to do just that with all his might.  
The structure of their group had changed. They weren’t the unit any longer they used to be. The lines blurred and everybody else was mingling with the Alexandrians, made new friends, got acquainted – and they left the one behind, who was unable or unwilling to follow them down that path. There was no need for a tracker and hunter inside these walls any longer and Daryl’s resistance, his stubborn remaining in the place he had earned, left him isolated, frozen in time while the world changed around him.  
Maybe all it took, was to give Daryl a reason. A reason to like this new world, too, to bend just enough to fit in without changing what made him _him._ There had got to be a way.

Rick’s eyes were filled with compassion when he looked over to the lonesome figure on the porch, that sat huddled in his spot, staring blindly ahead of himself as so many times before. Too many times before.    


__ _Nowhere man, please listen_  
_You don't know what you're missing_  
_Nowhere man_  
_The world is at your command_

  
The next moment, as if he had _felt_ Rick’s eyes on him, Daryl lifted his head and looked over to him.    
Even over the distance, Rick saw the archer’s eyes light up, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. It even widened, when the younger man lifted a hand and waved over to him. It took so little to make Daryl happy. These days it was obviously just a smile from Rick, that little bit of attention, just a moment of his time, undisturbed by …

 

     “Rick? Can I speak with you for a moment, please.”

Deanna approaching him and blocking his view over to Daryl, had Rick curse under his breath and only reluctantly focus on her. 

What had he gotten himself into when he accepted this job? Not only the one as sheriff of this town, but also the one in administrations next to Deanna, which kept him busy organizing and running pretty much every area of their current life. He was scheduling sentry duties and wall patrols, organized runs, assigned people to help with gardening or repairs throughout the town and at the wall …

     _“General drudge”,_ he couldn’t help thinking.

He didn’t shy away from hard work, but in right that moment Rick felt as though his own life was passing him by, while he spent every minute of the day focussing on other people’s concerns. Of course, keeping this town safe and the food supplies “humpty dumpty”, as Eugene liked to put it, was for his own benefit and that of his family as well, but in consequence he barely ever got to see that family anymore.   
When was the last time he had played with Judith or put her to bed, telling her a bedtime story? When did he last spend some quality time with his son, listening to what was important to him these days? Keeping in touch with a teenager was hard enough as a parent, and Rick felt he was losing that precious, fragile contact, because there was never the time to talk to Carl, to learn about his thoughts and emotions.   
Daryl. When they had first arrived in Alexandria, Rick used to sit in that corner of the porch next to Daryl almost every day, sharing a beer, talking or just enjoying each other’s presence, engulfed in their own very special way of silence, that was never awkward, always soothing.  
He missed Daryl. He missed his children. He missed himself. Hadn’t been himself in way too long and just when he thought, he was _coming back_ , was rediscovering the man he used to be, he had been drowned in loads of work.  
He had been up on his feet even before the sun came up that morning, hadn’t seen his children at all yet and when was the last time he had talked to Daryl, _really_ talked to him? He couldn’t even tell for sure. The day before yesterday? Or even before that?   
He had to put an end to this.   
Deanna was standing right in front of him now and even though she was a small woman, he wasn’t able to see Daryl any longer, without having to step to the side or crane his neck. He didn’t have to. He _knew_ what he would see. A lonesome man, sitting unmoving in that corner, the smile gone, once more just staring without really seeing anything, but what his mental cinema and his memories provided.

     _“What are you thinking of, Daryl? What’s going on in your mind? You’re not happy, I can see that, and I know, I’ve done very little to change that. Are you thinking about leaving? Will I wake up one morning and find you gone?”_

Rick wasn’t even surprised that the mere thought of Daryl not being with them .. with _him_ any longer, hurt him profoundly. And he knew why.

     “Rick?”

Azure blue eyes stopped staring right through the older woman and focussed on her now.

     “I’ve been wanting to talk to you, too”, Rick said determinedly to a surprised Deanna. “Let’s go over to your house.” 

     “Oh my”, she said with wide eyes, “that sounds serious.”

     “It is”, he replied, her eyes even widening, because he said it with a smile.   



	2. Chapter 2

The moment Rick’s eyes had been on him, Daryl had felt as though the sun had just broken through the clouds and the warm rays were caressing his skin, tickling him, wrapping him in a secure shell of warmth and light.    
He had rather bitten off his tongue than describe the sensation in such entirely sappy words, but it was the truth nevertheless. Rick always made him feel this way. Especially ever since he barely got to see him anymore. This short glance over the distance was probably the highlight of his entire day. A couple of seconds in which he had realized that his heart was still beating at all and that he could feel anything else than sadness or loneliness or despair. This place was burying him alive, but as long as Rick was there, so would he. 

_ I’ve never known myself as well as I know myself when I’m with him.  _

He must have heard or read that somewhere, and he had no idea who once said it, but it applied to him and Rick just perfectly. Daryl had never known himself, had never known who he could be, what he was capable of, who he _wanted_ to be. Until Rick Grimes had given him a reason to find out, explore his inner self and rise to be the best he could – for Rick. 

He noticed the movement behind his back and heard the soft rustling of clothes, even before a chubby arm reached through the braces and placed a carefully wrapped, odd looking item next to him.   
Despite the fact that he was being bothered once again, the hint of a smile appeared on his lips.

     “Them oat cakes again, Denise?”

     “Still amazes me how you can tell by sound if whatever’s approaching in your back is friend or foe. You didn’t even flinch, although I sneaked up on you. Should see Tara when I do that.”

She giggled, which had the smile on Daryl’s face widen. Not only to the imagination of a startled Tara, but mostly to Denise’s naïve assumption she could possibly be able to _sneak up_ on him.    
There weren’t many people, who were able to make him smile, yet she was one of them.

     “ 'Twasn’t hard ta figure out, it's you. That Omega 3 stuff doesn’t just _look_ like shit.”

     “Pfff.” She came up the steps to the porch and leaned against the supporting beam. “You’re not gonna tell me, you don’t like it. This house is my No. 1 consumer when it comes to _the Omega 3 stuff._ ”

Daryl looked at her deadpan.

     “Maggie’s feeding the pigs with it.” 

Denise looked at him entirely unimpressed.

     “Pigs are smart animals. And now we even got smart, healthy and well fed ones. I can live with that. It’s more than I can say about most people in this town.”

He cast her a meaningful look, but didn’t reply, so she shrugged, about to turn and leave again.

          “I gotta go. Got some more _stuff_ in the oven.

     “Did Carol challenge ya to a baking contest or something? Or why are the two of ya keep baking up a storm?”

Once more the stout young woman harrumphed. 

     “If anything, I’m trying to sabotage her distribution of way too much sugar and fat. I know, nutrition is an issue these days, but feeding people with unhealthy candy is hardly the way.” She spread her arms. “I learned the hard way. You don’t wanna end up looking like me.”

Daryl gave her a long, deep look before he reached for one of his squirrels and pulled it closer to finally go about his task.

     “Nothing wrong with the way ya look”, he said softly. “Ain’t giving a damn ‘bout appearances anyway. – Obviously.” 

She shrugged.

     “Yeah, well, most people do. Still.”

     “Like ya said – them pigs are smarter than _most people_.” He looked up and saw a smile spread over her chubby face. “Tell ya a secret. Reason this house is the No. 1 consumer of yer oat cakes is not Maggie feeding them to the pigs. I give ‘em ta Judith. And Carl. They need nutrition, healthy stuff – and they like ‘em.”   
He placed his hand gently on the package she had left next to him. “So, thanks.”

Denise’s smile even widened.

     “You’re welcome. I make sure to bring some more over later – for the pigs. Don’t want them to feel left out.”

     “Don’t bother. They’re happy. I give ‘em Carol’s cookies. _They_ can grow fat for all I care.”

He winked at the young woman, while she laughed out loud, her amused face triggering another smile that played around his lips. 

 

     “Hey, Denise.”

Carl came out of the house with Judith on his hand, who was toddling next to him with unsteady steps. 

Denise’s eyes widened.

     “Oh my God, when did she learn how to walk?”

The teenage boy looked at his baby sister with a proud smile.

     “Yesterday. She still needs to hold on to something, or someone, but she’s up on her feet.”

Denise crouched in front of the toddler and poked her index finger lightly into the little round belly.

     “Good job there, Judith. Your daddy must be so proud.”

     “Da’y”, Judith gurgled happily. 

The young woman looked up to Carl with a fascinated air.

     “She’s talking, too?”

     “Just that yet. Been trying to teach her to say ‘Carl’, but she won’t. Yet.”

Denise got back up and gave the boy’s shoulder an approving slap.

     “Looks like you spent a lot of quality time with your little sister there.”

     “Actually, teaching her how to walk and talk … That wasn’t me.” His unharmed eye moved over to the archer. “That was Daryl.” 

Denise arched an eyebrow and cast Daryl an appreciative look.

     “I see.”

She could barely refrain from laughing, when she saw his expression darken, while he was squirming uncomfortably. Even after all this time, he obviously still couldn’t handle praise or gratitude or affection for the most part. 

     “Everybody’s been so damn busy here lately”, he said gruffly. “Rick’s working his ass off ta help Deanna run this place. Can’t expect a teenage boy ta watch his baby sis all day long.”

     “Uh-huh.” That was all she replied.

     “Someone hadda teach her the basics or she’d be sitting on her li’l diaper butt, dribbling, till kingdom come.”

     “Uh-huh.”

     “Ah, shut up.”

He didn’t see the smile on Denise’s face turn into a grin, because he had turned to Judith and held his arms out to the little girl, the scowl on his face melting away.

     “Hey, li’l asskicker. C’mom. You can do it. C’mere.”

With happy little gurgling sounds, never letting go of her brother’s hand though, Judith approached Daryl with unsteady steps on her chubby short legs and a moment later Daryl’s strong arms lifted her easily onto his lap.

     “Well done, munchkin. Next I’m gonna show ya how ta shoot the crossbow and ride the bike.” 

He smiled widely at the little girl, when a chuckle from Denise had him look up. The smile crumbled.

     “What’s so funny?”

     “Nothing. It’s just cute, that’s all.”

She shrugged, trying to compose herself, so it wouldn’t appear as though she was laughing at him. She did not. If anything, she was smiling at him. 

     “Ya didn’t just call me _cute_ , did ya?”

     “I was talking about Judith.”

     “Yeah, ya better. And them cakes are burning ta coal right now. Don’t ya have ta be somewhere else?”

Plain shock flashed over her chubby face.

     “Oh, sh … oot. Be seeing you.”

That said, she hurried down the steps towards the infirmary, not seeing an amused sparkle coming to Daryl’s eyes.

For a moment Carl watched her hurry away, then he focussed on the archer and his baby sister again.

     “I was gonna go over to Enid’s. Can I leave Judith with you?”

Daryl looked at him deadpan, before he shrugged and gave an affirmative nod.

     “Sure.” _“What else I gotta do?”_

       “Thanks.”

The boy headed down the stairs as well, when Daryl’s voice had him stop once more.

     “Hey, I don’t wanna have ta babysit for more than this one. So ya better be reading comics or playing video games with that girl. Understood?”

     “Daryl!” The teenager blushed violently, looking around himself quickly to see, if anybody heard that remark.

     “Understood?” Daryl’s growl from the porch had him center his attention on the archer again.

     “Yes. ‘Course. Man, parents are so damn embarrassing at times.”

That said he picked up his pace in order to get away from there as fast as only possible without actually running, but Daryl’s call “That’s our job!” still reached him before he was able to get out of earshot. 

Just when Daryl had focussed on the little girl on his lap again, a frown appeared on his face. _Parents?_ Did Carl really just say that? No, surely he said _adults_ or something like that.   
Before he could ponder on that longer, he was distracted by Judith raising her little chubby arms and placing her hands to the man’s cheeks, patting lightly with an enchanting smile.

     “Da’y.”

The archer’s eyes widened.

     “Oh, man, I sure hope that means _Daryl._ ”

For a moment he allowed the little fingers in his face to tug at his beard, although that was anything but pleasant, when a set of heavy booted feet approached loudly. 

     _“Man, Peachtree Station was only half as busy as this place”,_ he couldn’t help thinking, while pulling an annoying face.

     “Hey, been looking for you, man.”

Abraham’s redhead peeked around the corner, accompanied by a broad smile that didn’t mirror on Daryl’s face in the least.

     “Ya found me. Task completed. Have a nice day.” 

     “Ain't we a li’l sunshine again today.”

The archer’s expression even darkened.  
      
     “Yer lookin’ for a grinning idiot, go over to the church. Ever since Rick stopped tearing off his stupid proclamations and he’s allowed ta preach all he wants, sun’s shining outta Gabriel’s ass.”

The remark had Abraham laugh out loud.

     “Good one. Hey, look, Rick assigned me to grab a couple of peeps to start building a new watchtower. Could use a pair of strong arms.” 

     “I’m busy.”

Abraham’s grin vanished as he piercingly looked at the squirrels and the little girl on Daryl’s lap. 

     “The squirrels are unlikely to run away and I’m sure, Mr. Sunshiny-ass is gonna take care of Judith …”

     “No.” Daryl got up and lifted the toddler onto his arm, holding her close. “Case ya haven’t notice – this is a li’l girl and not a challenge cup ta be passed around as soon as taking care of her is _inconvenient._ There’s a bunch of _peeps_ out there doing nothin’ but playing pocket pool, so leave me alone.”

Abraham gave a derisive snort.

     “Look, nanny Daryl, we got more important …”

The next moment he took a precautious step back, when Daryl had approached him in few large strides and planted himself in front of him with a killer scowl. 

     “Ya best leave now, ginger.”

     “Or what? Ya gonna toss a dirty diaper at me?” 

Judith didn’t understand the exchange, but she felt the tension between the two men and their angry inflection had her whimper. Daryl ran his hand soothingly over her back, before he shot Abraham another scowl.

     “I just might, jackass.”

That said the archer turned on his heels and headed into the house, leaving a stunned Abraham behind. 

 

Inside the house Daryl pulled in a couple of deep breaths to down his anger and frustration, grateful for the fact, that there was none of the other residents of this house present at the moment. He couldn’t bear anymore people right now. As a matter of fact, there was only one person, who would have been able to catch him before spiralling downwards into the oncoming depression, but that person was unlikely to spare any of his time for him.     
With a deep sigh he placed a tender kiss onto Judith’s soft curls.

     “Time for a nap, missy.” 

With heavy feet and an even heavier heart he walked down the corridor that led to the small room in back of the first floor. He had occupied it ever since they arrived in Alexandria, but he still didn’t feel comfortable in there. On the contrary. Each time he stepped over the doorstep and looked out of the window, a claustrophobic feeling washed over him and almost choked him.    
The room was facing the wall. It appeared to be so close, that he felt as though he only had to reach out his hand and would be able to touch it. Bars at the window couldn’t have made him feel more caged in than this view alone already did. Only at nights, when it was dark and he couldn’t see the wall out there any longer, some of the pressure on his chest dissolved and allowed him to breathe in here and get some rest.    
He kept the window open at all times and when he closed his eyes and listened to the wind in the trees, he was able to pretend. Pretend he was out there with just the wilderness of the woods surrounding him, no wall to close him in, no people to smother him. Just him. And Rick.    
Sometimes he allowed himself to dream. Dream of being out there, with Rick by his side. Just them. Just for a while. 

They never go far, even in those dreams. Judith and Carl are still in Alexandria – Rick would never leave without them and neither would he. Leaving is not an option. They need this security, the humpty dumpty food situation, people – and the wall.    
     Reality doesn’t leave him a choice, no way out. His dreams do.    
Dreams of the wind in the trees, playing with his hair. Birds singing, the sun caressing his skin … No, not the sun. Rick. Rick’s hands running over his bare skin, warm and tender. Soft lips on his own, the lean body pressed against him, while sky-blue eyes look at him lovingly. 

When he wakes up, he’s alone. Always. Alone in this small, dark, cold cage.     

Daryl remembered telling Aaron weeks back about his idea to leave the house and rather pitch up a tent in the yard, the way he had done on Hershel’s farm, but Aaron had talked him out of it. He had said, it would have people become even more suspicious of him, label him as ‘odd’ and see him as an outsider even more than they already did.    
He had reacted in his usual “I don’t care” way, which had Aaron look at him calmly, a warm, sympathetic smile on his lips. 

     “I know, you don’t”, he had answered. “But if you try to adjust just a little nevertheless, it’s not for you – it’s for your family.”

That’s when Daryl had reconsidered and buried the idea to pitch up a tent. He didn’t care in the least what people thought about him, but to have his behavior redound on Rick and the rest of their group was the last thing he wanted. 

 

Entering his room, the archer avoided to look out of the window and approached the bed that was sitting right underneath it with gentle steps.    
He lay Judith down with a soothing hush and ran his hand gently over her hair, but the little girl turned onto her belly instantly, trying to get back up, whining.  Gently Daryl turned her onto her back once more, his hand running slow soothing circles on her belly.

     “Want me ta tell ya a bedtime story?”

She still wouldn’t calm down, so he kicked off his shoes and stretched out next to her, showing her how entirely wonderful it was to be lying in this bed. An example that obviously convinced her, for she lay still all of a sudden, one of her little fists getting entangled in his long hair and playing with it due to the lack of any other toy in reach. It tweaked, but Daryl let her have her way. After all, she was the reason why he got up in the morning and kept going. Since a tracker and hunter was apparently not needed any longer, being _nanny_ Daryl at least gave his life some meaning. 

     “Ready for that story now?” he asked gently, only to have a frown flash over his face a second later. 

He didn’t _know_ any bedtime stories or fairy tales. Not one. His parents or Merle never bothered to read or tell him stories, if they even knew any themselves.    
But all of those stories, they were part of a world that didn’t exist anymore anyway. Sappy prince-meets-princess romance novels never were his cup of tea to begin with and why should he bother telling Judith stories about places and things she would never see, that didn’t concern her in the least.    
There was one place that concerned her. One place that was definitely a part of _this_ world. A place he still remembered with a dull ache in his chest. 

     “Gonna tell ya about the place ya was born”, he picked up softly. “They called it _a_ _prison_ , but that didn’t apply at all anymore. A prison used ta be a place bad people was locked in, but when ya was born there, there was no bad people in it. On the contrary. There was yer mom …” He swallowed hard. “Yer dad and Carl, Carol and Maggie and Glenn. Beth …”

He stopped, blinking against a sudden stinging sensation in his eyes and chose to just go on telling Judith about the place, instead of bringing back painful memories.    
     “There was fences, but not ta hold people in anymore – they was to protect them from the outside. A li’l like the wall here, but that place … 'twas different. 'Twas … _home_.”

The stinging sensation remained and for a moment Daryl wondered, if he should ask one of the neighbors for a book of fairytales after all and rather forget about this kind of story.  

     “Ya woulda liked it there”, he continued after taking a few deep breaths. “Yer dad … he and Carl planted a garden and we had pigs there, too. Just like the ones I took ya to the other day. We was gonna paint one of them cells in bright colors for ya, as a nursery, and we was planning ta have a sand pit and swings for all the kids ta play …” His voice broke. “Yer dad and a nice old fellow named Hershel, they was trying ta grow trees – apple and cherry and nut trees. For food, ta climb on, ta sit outside in the shade. Woulda taken years for ‘em ta grow big and tall, but … guess time is something we just ain’t gettin’ anymore these days. But yer daddy, he’s working hard ta build a new place for us here and if anyone can do that, it’s him.”

She looked at him with big eyes, listening to what he was telling her, undoubtedly without really understanding, but something in his inflection must have made her sense, that this wasn’t a funny story. There was regret in his voice and wistfulness.     
The little hand let go of his hair and patted his cheek once again.

     “Da’y?”

The archer looked at her lovingly.

     “Yer not saying _Daryl_ , are ya? Yer asking for yer daddy? Ya miss him?” He placed a kiss on her head. “Yeah, I miss him, too.”

 

Rick approached the house with large steps and a quicker pace than he was even aware of.    
He was on a mission. There was something he had to do, something he _wanted_ to do and this time it was not about sentry duty or repairs. This time it was _really_ important.    
Taking two steps at a time, he hurried onto the porch, expecting to still find Daryl there, but the spot was empty.    
Rick’s eyes widened when they came to rest on the squirrels that lay untouched, not gutted, not skinned – simply forgotten. Daryl simply leaving and forgetting about his quarry was a thing unheard of and had the uneasy feeling in Rick’s guts increase.    
When he entered the house, it was quiet, save for soft music coming from a room upstairs, accompanied by Rosita’s melodic voice, as well as Eugene’s gruesome off-key singing. On any other day this would have made Rick grin, but right now he just wanted to find Daryl and thus hurried down the corridor to the archer’s room without giving the other residents of this house another thought.

 

Warm sunshine on his face and the rustling of leaves, dancing to the mild breeze in the trees – those are the sensations that register as Daryl walks through the quiet woods. He thinks, he hears music from far away. Someone back in Alexandria must be playing it way too loud and he makes a mental note to mention it to Rick next time he sees him. People have to keep it down for saftey reasons and they should know better than that.

     “Daryl?”

There is Rick’s voice next to him, which has Daryl’s heart instantly skip a beat. He is here! He is right there with him. Out here.   
Daryl turns his head and feels a smile creep onto his face the moment he sees the face he has missed so achingly. Rick doesn’t look as tired as he has over the previous weeks. There is a wide smile on his handsome features and in the back of his mind Daryl realizes just how much he has missed that smile as well. Rick’s eyes are bright in a way he hasn’t seen them in a long time, if ever. Have they always been this blue? 

     “Daryl.”

The older man’s smile widens. God, can someone just miss _everything_ about another person? Even Rick’s voice is like music to his ears. They haven’t spoken to each other in way too long.   
And now he is out here with him. Just like he has always dreamed of. Just the two of them.   
Rick reaches out a hand and has it gently and tenderly run over the bare skin of Daryl’s arm, his touch warm and at the same time almost electrifying. The archer’s pulse rate picks up considerably, the little hairs on his arm standing on end as he reaches out a hand of his own to touch the face he loves so much. He wants to wrap his arms around the lean body in front of him, longs to kiss those delicate lips so badly.

          _Dare, Daryl. Just dare._

He feels Rick catch the hand he has reach out to him with his own and hold on, running his thumb softly over the back of Daryl’s hand.

     “Hey, wake up, sleeping beauty.” 

 

With a frustrated moan Daryl came back around and squinted against the sunlight that shone through the window of his room straight into his face.    
When his eyes had adjusted to the light, he turned his head to look into the face he had just seen in his dream. His confusion was palpable.    
Was this real now or yet another dream? He could almost still feel Rick’s hand run over his arm and he still felt the warmth of his friend’s hand holding his own.    
The next moment he realized that the younger man _was_ in fact still holding his hand, which had Daryl give yet another frustrated sigh and turn away.    
A dream. This, too, had to be just a dream. Rick wasn’t here, sitting right next to him on the edge of his bed, holding his hand and looking at him with a mixture of concern and a smile. 

     “You okay?”

Daryl’s head whipped around and he looked at Rick with wide eyes. Couldn’t be …

     “What?” That was all he was able to choke out.

     “I said, are you okay?” The sheriff gave him a scrutiny and leaned even closer to him, looking him deep in the eyes. “You simply left your squirrels out on the porch, and for someone sleeping with one eye and ear open, it took you quite a while to wake up. What’s the matter?” 

     “Nothing.” Daryl breathed in deep several times. “It’s just … Nothing. Forget it.”

     “Huh.” Rick gave his hand another gentle squeeze and then let go, having Daryl instantly feel a sense of loss.

The archer sat up and stretched his legs, noticing with surprise that Rick still did not move an inch away from him.

     “Next time ya march into ma room like that, ya best knock first, Grimes. I may have company.”

Rick cocked his head, while his lips twitched suspiciously in the attempt to suppress a smirk. 

     “I see you already do”, he replied mildly, nodding at the sleeping baby next to his friend. 

Daryl followed his gaze and couldn’t help smiling.

       “Yeah, only woman in ma life.”

     “Same here.”

Two sets of blue eyes locked as Daryl searched for any indication of regret or longing in the other man’s expression. Rick hadn’t seen anyone ever since Lori died, but he had stopped wearing his wedding ring quite a while ago. A clear sign that this part of his life lay in the past, that he did not consider himself a married man any longer and his time of mourning was over. He was probably open to a new love. Did he feel lonely? As lonely as Daryl felt? Was he looking for someone new to share his life? 

The archer swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. There was no indication that Rick felt any regret for not having another woman in his life than his baby daughter, but still he might have been on the look-out. And it was unlikely for Daryl to be the person he was looking for. 


	3. Chapter 3

In that moment the _woman_ in their life started to squirm and wake up, giving an unhappy whining sound. Both men reacted instantly, but when Rick reached his arms out to his daughter to pick her up, Daryl just leaned back to give him better access. He watched as the younger man lifted the toddler over him and placed her on his lap, while Daryl sat back up and watched them out of the corner of his eyes.   
This was _Rick’s_ daughter. During the past weeks Daryl had often enough blinded that fact out.   
He dreaded to follow that train of thought. Dreaded to think of the possibility, the _likelihood_ , that one day there would be someone new at Rick’s side. A woman, who would not only take _him_ away from Daryl, but Judith and Carl along with him. The people who meant the world to him. His family. He was going to lose them. One day. And he had no idea how he was going to survive this. 

Rick placed a loving kiss on the little girl’s head and then dandled her gently on his knees. 

      “Did you have a nice nap, sweetheart? Did Daryl tell you a story or sing you a song?”

The archer couldn’t help pulling a face.

      “Yeah, Daryl did”, he replied. “Told her a story. Ain’t gonna torture the poor kid singing songs.”

A smile spread over the sheriff’s face. 

      “Pity. I bet, you got a great singing voice.”

      “Yeah, why don’t ya go shit someone else? That voice was made for growling or yelling, sure as hell not for singing songs ta li’l girls.”

Rick nudged Daryl’s knee with his own.

      “Always worth a try. And I really appreciate you doing your job so well, nanny Daryl.”

The archer’s expression darkened visibly.

      “Don’t call me that. I’ve heard it. – Ya making fun of me, too, Grimes?”

The smile on Rick’s face made room for a serious air as he looked the older man in the eyes.

      “Not at all. I mean it. Judith’s been passed around way too often, just because I don’t get a breather lately. I know, what you’re doing for my kids, again, and it means a lot. – Thank you.”

Daryl shrugged.

      “No big deal.”

      “It is.”

Daryl averted his eyes and picked at a loose thread that hung from a hole in his pants.

      “Nah, it’s a helluva lot better job than … well, all the other crap that allegedly needs ta be done around this place.”

Rick cocked his head and cast him a thoughtful look.

      “You still don’t like being in _this place_ , do you?”

The archer sighed audibly, not answering right away and obviously undecided whether he was going to reply to that question at all. In the end he said:  
       
      “I’m trying, Rick.”

      “I know.”

The younger man placed his hand gently on Daryl’s knee and gave it a squeeze, surprised that the archer didn’t flinch to this unexpected touch.   
Before either men had a chance to say anymore, Judith started squirming on her father’s lap and gave a whiny “Da’y.”

Rick’s eyes widened as he looked at his daughter with a delighted smile on his face.

      “She’s talking?”

Again Daryl shrugged.

      “Just that yet.”

Rick bobbed his knees some more to soothe the whining toddler.

      “Sounds like _daddy._ ”

      “Da’y!”

The word was said very determinedly this time, while Judith just let herself drop towards the bed, reaching her arms out to Daryl. On reflex both men caught her simultaneously, but when he noticed that the archer’s hands held firmly on to the small body, Rick let go. Arching an eyebrow, he cast his friend a questioning look.

      “Da’y?”

He was in between surprise and laughter, both of which he concealed carefully, when he noticed Daryl actually blush and squirm uncomfortably. 

      “Think she’s saying _Daryl._ Sorry.”

      “Why? She saw far more of you lately than she saw of me. And if it hadn’t been for you …” He didn’t have to end the sentence. Didn’t have to bring up the events of Judith’s first days in this world. Daryl knew what he was trying to say, without him actually doing so. “Whether she’s saying _daddy_ or _Daryl_ … Doesn’t matter. It’s probably the same to her.”

Daryl lifted his head and looked at his friend with a surprised frown on his face. Obviously Rick didn’t take the least offense in the fact that his daughter may be calling another man _daddy_ and even preferred being held by him instead of Rick. Most other men would have been angry and jealous. 

Before he could follow that train of thought further, Rick got up and said unexpectedly:

      “Wanna go for a walk?”

The archer’s eyes narrowed.

      “What is it with taking walks today? Glenn and Maggie asked me the same thing. You guys should get a dog, if ya …”

      “Daryl.” Rick cut in calmly, effectively having the archer fall quiet, and then added: “Deanna asked me to take a look at a couple of the unoccupied houses. If you and Aaron bring back more people, they need to stay somewhere and she wants me to check, if those places need renovations, repairs, you know.”

      “Huh. You’re Deanna’s realtor now?”

The younger man gave an annoyed snort.

      “I’m pretty much everything these days. Whatever needs to be done to keep this place going. We all get to do our job, as Hershel used to say. And today, this is mine. So, wanna join me?”

      “Sure.”

Rick held out a hand to the older man in an inviting gesture and, lifting Judith on his one arm, Daryl reached out to it with his other. Rick pulled him to his feet and for a moment they ended up standing close in front of each other, Rick still holding on to Daryl’s hand. A smile tugged at the corners of the younger man’s mouth, then he let go and turned to the door.

      “Don’t see what ya need me for”, Daryl’s deep voice sounded behind him. “Don’t know crap about houses and _renovations._ ” 

      “I just appreciate your opinion”, Rick said over his shoulder. “That’s all.”

      “Huh. Got nothing else ta do anyway.” He looked at the little girl in his arm. “Whadda ya say, munchkin, wanna go look at stupid houses?” 

 

When they walked into the family room, Rosita and Eugene were in the kitchen preparing a late lunch. On second glance it was Eugene who did the preparing, while Rosita obviously had the supervision and gave clear instructions on how to chop the vegetables, while she sat on the kitchen counter, dangling her legs in time to the still playing record player. 

Rick pulled a face and cast the device a pained frown. 

      “What _is_ that noise?”

Rosita arched an eyebrow.

      “That is _art_ , not noise, you twerp.”

      “Maybe you could keep the _art_ down, so …”

      “Man”, Daryl slapped Rick’s shoulder while he skirted around him, “leave her alone. That’s Led Zepplin.” And he even cast Rosita an appreciative smirk while he said that. 

She pointed in his direction with a wide grin on her pretty face.

      “That’s my man!” she exclaimed enthusiastically and jumped off the kitchen counter. “Wanna dance?”

The smirk vanished.

      “Hell no. Ya nuts? Ain’t no music for dancing.”

      “Yeah, I know, but we’re out of the _good_ stuff to smoke, so dancing will have to do.”

This brought the smirk back to Daryl’s face. The next moment Rick appeared by his side and held his hands out to him.

      “Gimme my daughter. We’re leaving this den of iniquity.”

Rosita laughed out loud.

      “Just kidding, Rick. Relax.” She walked to the record player and turned it off, before heading straight for Daryl and Judith. “If I promise to play some Disney sing-alongs, can she stay with Eugene and me for a while? We'll feed her, too.”

      “You mean, _I_ am going to feed her”, Eugene cut in matter-of-factly, “since I’m solely preparing this meal.” He cast a glance at Rick and Daryl. “It’s _not_ sorghum, by the way.” The reproach in his inflection was hard to ignore. 

The two men looked at each other for a second, most obviously sharing the same thought: _“We’ll never hear the end of it.”_

Rick turned back to Rosita.

      “You sure?” 

      “Yes, I’m sure”, she said happily and lifted the little girl off Daryl’s arm. “You two go ahead and do whatever it was you were gonna do. We’ll take care of her:” 

Rick just gave a curt nod and then gestured for Daryl to follow him outside. He took the lead, but before the archer headed to the door as well, he whispered to Rosita:

      “Screw Disney. Let the girl have some fun.”

She giggled, when she caught his drift, but shook her head with regret.

      “Would love to, but actually _Eugene_ loves the Disney sing-alongs, too. He’s gonna snitch, if he doesn’t get to listen to them.”

Daryl’s features distorted as though he was in pain.

      “Ya kiddin’ me.”

He cast Eugene a probing look, just as the younger man was scuffling his way over to the sink, his mullet in a little ponytail, wearing shorts as well as totally not matching knee socks in sandals. Rosita followed Daryl’s gaze and then cast him a meaningful look.

      “Sorry”, he just said, “had no idea it’s _that_ bad.”

She giggled again.

      “Actually, it’s not.” 

And when he noticed the happy sparkle in her eyes, he understood. Daryl’s lips twitched as his eyes wandered once more between the odd couple, then he turned to follow Rick, who was waiting for him on the porch.

      “Have fun”, he said to Rosita on walking away. “Try ta teach Judith ta say _Pocahontas._ ”

      “What’s in it for me, if she does?” the young Latina called after him.

      “I’ll teach Eugene”, Daryl replied over his shoulder and heard her laugh hysterically while the door fell shut behind him. 

 

Rick had taken the lead at first, but after only few steps down the street he had signalled Daryl through looks alone to fall in beside him. He didn’t want to lead anymore – not when it came to Daryl. Just as he wasn’t the type to ever follow.    
He wanted Daryl by his side, nowhere else.    
Carol used to say, that Daryl had earned his place and Rick would have agreed unconditionally. He had. And that place was right there next to Rick. In every respect.    
They walked silently shoulder to shoulder and, without even being aware of it, totally in sync. By now, they usually did, the mere sight of this prompting one or the other smirk from people watching them together.    
When they neared a street that led up to the wall, a frown appeared on Daryl’s face and he slowed down.

      “Where are we going?”

Rick turned around to him and pointed towards the wall.

      “Just down there. The last house in this row is empty.”

      “I know.”

The younger man stopped and cast his friend a questioning glance.

      “Have you been there before?”

Daryl’s expression was impossible to read.

      “Uh-huh. When I was on patrol, checking the wall … It runs right past that house’s yard.”

      “Okay. Let’s go take a look then.”

Rick turned into said street and noticed that Daryl followed him only reluctantly, falling in beside him only after several steps in that direction. They walked for a minute in silence again, then Rick asked gingerly:

      “You’ve been here more than once, right? And not just on patrol.”

      “Makes ya say that?” Daryl’s voice was even deeper than usually, the inflection clearly defensive.

      “It’s a cul-de-sac, no one ever goes down that street except for the people living in the first few houses. They saw you.”

Daryl stopped dead in his tracks and looked at Rick with a scowl.

      “D’ya have people watching me?” 

The sheriff turned on his heels with wide eyes and a startled expression.

      “No, why would I do that? They just … told me.”

      “Oh, I get it. The _odd_ guy was hanging out in their neat white-picket-fence-neighborhood, so they thought it best ta call the cops?”

      “Come on, Daryl, cut it out. You know, it’s not like that.”

The archer gave a derisive snort.

      “Yeah? Not in yer world, officer.” 

Rick just looked at his friend for a moment, then he walked up to him and dared place one hand gently on the other man’s shoulder. A gesture that, too, was accepted without flinching or his hand being shook off. 

      “Come on”, he just said softly and gestured with his head down the street. 

Daryl didn’t comply instantly, but after a moment he started walking again and a minute later they reached their destination. 

The house was far from being as pretty as the others in town. Apparently it was one of the oldest ones and most definitely one of a kind in this neighborhood. Maybe there had been similar ones before, but they must have been torn down a long time ago to make room for the luxurious and fancy new houses, like the one Deanna had assigned to Rick’s group upon arrival.    
This one here must have survived the construction boom somehow. Maybe its former owners had loved it just the way it was.    
It was smaller, the siding not of a modern classy white or clay, but dark blue. The shutters and window frames had apparently been of a shining white once, but now the paint was chipping off in most places and the shining white had turned into a dirty off-white. Some of the shutters had come loose and were only attached to the house by one angle alone now, or they had fallen off completely, while the flyscreens in front of the front door as well as the windows had more holes than a golf corse.    
The garden that extended to the side and back of the house, was a jungle. It must have been years, since someone last mowed the lawn or cut the bushes and trees. The overall impression anyone would have gotten of this place was _messy._

          “Well, this is it”, Rick said, making a sweeping gesture towards the house and the garden. “I don’t see how we could possibly house any people in this mess. Would take lots of work first. Yard first of all. Those trees and bushes need to go.”

          “No”, Daryl replied almost fiercely, “they cover the wall. It’s the only place in town where ya can’t see it, can pretend it’s not there …” His voice trailed off, while he looked into the wild green of the garden.

Rick cast him a glance from the side.

          “People are grateful for the wall and like to know it’s there. Makes them feel safe.”

          “Or caged”, Daryl muttered, unaware of the fact that Rick heard him perfectly well.

          “The garden is not important anyhow”, Rick picked up once more. “Let’s take a look inside.”

They approached the house together, the younger man noticing in the back of his mind, that his companion was way slower than usual though, as if he didn’t like to be here. On the steps to the porch he stopped and looked at the archer questioningly.

          “Something wrong?”

Daryl slowly shook his head, but didn’t reply.

          “Hey, I asked you to come along to gimme your opinion. So let’s hear it.”

The archer pulled in a deep breath and took great interest of the tip of his shoes for a moment, before he looked up and met Rick’s eyes.

          “This ain’t a good place for people ta stay. It’s falling apart. Why don’t we go look at the other houses instead?”

Rick cocked his head.

          “We will, but I still wanna take a look inside here first. Never thought I see Daryl Dixon give up so quickly.”

He winked at him and proceeded to the door, not seeing Daryl bite his lip before he followed him with a dark air on his face.

The interior of the house looked surprisingly well. It wasn’t the Hilton, but the furnishing, decorations and choice of colors emitted a warm and cozy ambience.  
Rick looked around himself and then shrugged.

          “Not too bad. It’s a little run down and not nearly as big and luxurious as …”

          “It’s perfect”, Daryl cut in before he even knew what he was saying. “I mean”, he hemmed and hawed, “not everybody needs them marble and stainless steel crap.”

Rick’s lips twitched.

          “Maybe you’re right.”

He walked into the kitchen, that was separated from the family room by a brick half-wall and started opening a couple of cabinets.

          “Hey, take a look at this”, he called over to Daryl a moment later, pointing at something he had found in one of them.

Daryl looked over to him with deep concern, his discomfort almost palpable.

          “We should get outta here and forget about this place”, he said gravely while he walked over to his friend.

          “Okay, but first take a look at this.”

He stepped aside to make room for his friend and watched him out of the corners of his eyes. With a deep sigh Daryl stepped closer to the cabinet. There wasn’t really anything too thrilling to see there, save for the usual ordinary set of plates and glasses and mugs …  
The next moment his eyes widened and Rick heard him gasp.  
A large white mug was sitting on the lower board right in front of the archer’s eyes, five letters written on its front in fat black letters. D A R Y L

Daryl’s head whipped around and he stared at Rick with wide eyes, total incomprehension written all over his face. His gaze was met by an insecure smile and an apologetic gesture as Rick said:

          “Sorry, I lured you here like this. I know, you’re not happy in the big place with all the people around you, and the neighbors told me that you hang out here a lot. – It’s your secret hiding place, isn’t it?”

He saw Daryl swallow thickly, his face a stony façade. When there was no answer, Rick continued.

          “I talked to Deanna and, well, it’s about time we stopped sticking together around the clock as though we were still out on the road. Things are different now.” He gestured to his surroundings. “This place gives you more privacy. It’s more … _you._ ”

          “Yeah? ‘Cause it’s run down?”

He didn’t even know, why he had said that. It sounded provocative and defensive, as though he wouldn’t appreciate what Rick was trying to do for him here. He did. But … He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but something felt terribly wrong and confused him to an extent, that had him lash out the way he just did.  
Rick looked at him calmly, not in the least annoyed about Daryl’s snippy remark.

          “No”, he replied gently after a moment, “not because it’s run down. Because it stands proud and strong and doesn’t give a damn about appearances. It may not be as classy as others, but it’s solid and reliable and inside, it’s warm and …”  
He stopped, when he realized how much Daryl hated sappy scenes and that this speech was likely to have him turn and run any second now.  
“It’s just very special, that’s all”, he closed, giving an insecure shrug.

Daryl just stared at him deadpan. Rick had no reason to worry about him turning and running due to his sappy speech, because as a matter of fact Daryl had only heard parts of it and even that part had only marginally registered.  
The blood was swooshing in his ears, while his pulse raced. His emotions were in a turmoil, his thoughts one single chaos and he was desperately trying to get a grip.  
What was he going to tell Rick? How was he going to tell him that this – this house and living here instead of in that big place with the rest of their group – was his deepest desire and his greatest fear all at once.  
It was true, he had been here before, many times. This was his secret hideout, the place he ran to when he needed some space, peace and quiet to hear himself think, a sanctuary inside these walls, when the gate was closed and he had neither the time, nor the excuses to leave Alexandria.  
Most days he would sit in the backyard underneath the huge trees there and pretend. Pretend to be out in the woods. And it worked, too. If he sat with the back to the house, all he would see was the green wilderness of this garden. No one ever came here. Apparently he was the only person in all of Alexandria, who was looking for solitude and a place, where the wall was invisible. Everybody else obviously loved to stick together, have people around them day in, day out and talk, talk, talk … A shudder ran down Daryl’s spin. Did those people never grow tired of hearing themselves talk?  
Nobody fancied overgrown gardens and small run down houses. Before all this happened, before the apocalypse, some of the people living in this town may have been owners of a big mansion such as the one Rick’s group was living in – naturally they wouldn’t want any less to stay in now. And other’s saw their big chance to finally be the owner of a kind of house, they would never have been able to afford in the old world. Why would they settle for less? Daryl remembered how Rick had told him about Lori and him driving through fancy neighborhoods, looking at the big expensive houses and imagining, that one day they would live in a place like that.  
Daryl had never done that. He knew his place. He didn’t delude himself that he would ever be anything else than he was, and although it was probably the least reason to be proud, he wasn’t going to forget where he came from.  
So when he had first found this little shabby blue house, he had loved the place on first sight. Rick was right – this was him. Perhaps for all the reasons Rick had listed up, but most of all, because this was the only spot in all of Alexandria that felt like _home._  
And now it was offered to him. He could move in today, get away from the crowd and the noise and the marble and stainless steal. Then why did this feel like a nightmare all of a sudden?

He looked into Rick’s eyes that had locked with his own, and wanted to scream.

          _“Ya don’t understand, do ya, Rick? Ya think, being in this place would make me happy and I know, ya only mean well. I appreciate the intention. But … If I wanted this house, I coulda asked Deanna maself. I wanted to, many times, and yet did not. Just like I thought about leaving altogether and didn’t do that, either. Don’t ya see why?”_

       


	4. Chapter 4

  
_“Ya don’t understand, do ya, Rick? Ya think, being in this place would make me happy and I know, ya only mean well. I appreciate the intention. But … If I wanted this house, I coulda asked Deanna maself. I wanted to, many times, and yet did not. Just like I thought about leaving altogether and didn’t do that, either. Don’t ya see why?”_

          “Daryl?” Rick looked at him probingly. “What is it? Don’t you want to live here?”

The archer pulled in another deep shuddering breath.

          “No. I mean, yeah, but … Damn.”  
         
The younger man waited for him to continue, but when he did not and just stared at the mug inside the cabinet, Rick picked up again.

          “I know, you don’t like being in Alexandria. You’re not happy here, yet you … you’re trying. One way or the other. – Why?”

Daryl looked at him, a frown shortly flashing over his features, before he was displaying his usual deadpan again.

          “’s like I told Deanna … Carl and Judith … they need a home, a safe place, people, friends. Well, _this._ ”

          “Huh. That’s the reason for _them_ to stay, and me. I know, you love the kids, but they can hardly be _your_ reason to stay, if you hate it here that much. So tell me, what’s keeping you?”

Daryl was at a loss for words, as so many times before. All he could do was look at Rick and hope to come up with anything to say, before his friend either thought him a complete fool or decided to forget about the whole idea, go back to the other house and leave things as they were.  
He wanted to tell him, but expressing emotions was something he never learned. There had never been anyone in his life before, he had felt this strongly for. He had never loved anyone as much as he loved Rick. There had never been another moment in his life, when he had to say out loud what was in his heart and he didn’t know how. All he could do was lock eyes with Rick and allow him to look deep into his soul, hoping he would find the answer there and would understand without Daryl actually having to say it.  
A witness to this scene would have thought the two men had frozen in time, unmoving and silent, but while they were doing nothing but stand close to each other, looking the other one in the eyes, a myriad of thoughts and emotions were bouncing back and forth between of them. If those had been colors, fireworks would have lit up the small, shabby house.  
It was Rick, who spoke first, his voice barely more than a whisper:  
         
          “Maybe I can help you decide”, he said with the ghost of a smile. “There is something else I need to show you.”

He reached for the door of the cabinet next to the one he had already opened and then gestured for the archer to take a look in there as well. 

Daryl used to say that he was afraid of nothing and for the longest time he had deluded himself, had thought it was true, simply because not even the dead rising or all the human scum he had ever come across had been able to faze him.   
But he had learned the truth a long time ago. The night Joe, the leader of the claimers, had put his gun to Rick’s temple, threatening to pull the trigger, Daryl had come to realize that he _was_ afraid.    
He could handle the dead, he could handle this world – but not without Rick. The chance of losing him, was the one thing that scared the archer more than anything and he felt that right now, right here he was about to reach a crossroads. Whatever was in that cabinet probably called for a crucial decision, was likely to change everything. He almost dreaded to look. 

Breathing in deep, he peeked around the open door and froze. Later he would be unable to say for how long he had just stared into that cabinet, but Rick never grew tired of teasing him, that he had been about to pull up a chair. _That_ long.   
But how do you measure the time of that one moment in your life, when all the pieces fall into place? When all the dreams and hopes and wishes you allowed yourself to have, come true – all at once.  
There was no more in that cabinet then three more of those white mugs, reading _Rick_ , _Carl_ and _Li’l Asskicker_. 

        “Yer serious?” Daryl managed to choke out, barely daring to look at Rick. 

Maybe this was just some kind of a joke or he was interpreting the situation entirely wrong. Instead of giving an answer, Rick lifted his hand in slow motion and gently pushed a strand of Daryl’s long bangs out of his face, before he had his hand run tenderly over the dark hair, nodding. Then he said:

        “You’re okay with this?”

The last time Daryl had felt this stunned, was when Rick had said “You’re my brother” to him back then, after what must have been the worst night of his life. But with that one single sentence, Rick had made it the best, had turned his world around in every respect and left him feeling more alive than ever before. An overwhelming emotion that had left him speechless. Then and now.

For a moment he just looked Rick in the eyes, the way he had done back then, before he let his head drop slowly onto the younger man’s shoulder, accompanied by a relieved sigh he couldn’t help. The only other time he had allowed himself to display this mixture of weakness, relief and affection combined, was when Carol had saved their lives in Terminus. In a way, Rick had done no less just now.  

With a smile, Rick placed a kiss on Daryl’s head and whispered to him: 

        “I take that as a _yes_.” 

Instead of replying, Daryl just wrapped his arms around the younger man’s waist and pulled him close. Rick returned the hug, while his smile was slowly fading and made room for a contrite air.

        “I’m sorry, Daryl.”

        “For what?”

        “For waiting so long. I should have done this a long time ago, but I wasn’t  sure …”

He fell quiet when he felt Daryl even increase the embrace as though he was afraid Rick would just disappear the next moment, if he didn’t hold on tight enough. In fact, a similar thought had just crossed the archer’s mind, when he was wondering, if maybe he was interpreting too much into Rick’s words and gestures.   
After all, he had offered no more than to move into this house along with his children, which didn’t mean in the least that he was reciprocating Daryl’s emotions for him. Maybe Daryl was making a complete fool of himself just now. Maybe he had better let go and brace himself for the fact, that his dreams and hopes had _not_ come true and probably never would, either. 

 

_He's as blind as he can be_   
_Just sees what he wants to see_  
_Nowhere man, can you see me at all?_

 

        “You know”, Rick said in right that moment, “moving in here does have a downside.” Slowly Daryl lifted his head off Rick’s shoulder, waiting for the hammer to fall, when the younger man added: “It’s a small house, so I’m afraid you’ll have to share a room with me …”

Their faces were only inches apart now as they held each other’s gaze, quietly and unmoving. The hint of a smile appeared on Rick’s face, while he watched Daryl’s eyes move between his – left, right, left, right – as though the archer meant to make sure he hadn’t misread a sign, hadn’t missed any hidden hint.   
        “Stop that”, Rick breathed, before he leaned in cautiously and touched his lips to Daryl’s in a feather light kiss. 

In a way he had expected Daryl to pull back instantly with something close to shock or embarrassment or discomfort. He was totally taken aback, when on the contrary the archer responded instantly to this chaste kiss by pressing his lips harder to Rick’s, while he placed one hand to the back of the younger man’s neck as though he meant to keep _him_ from pulling back. Simultaneously they wrapped their arms around each other and pressed close, while they deepened the kiss hungrily.   
They didn’t think. Didn’t leave any room for the thought that this should have been _odd,_ because only moments ago they had been no more than friends, brothers. It didn’t matter. Why bother trying to give _this_ a name, a label, an explanation – it wouldn’t change the way they felt. And that was all they did in right that moment – feel. Let their hearts rule their minds and thus blind out everything that didn’t have any business there with them – like the rest of the world.   
When they broke apart, they didn’t say a word. For just the same reason they hadn’t given the turn in their relationship any thought. There was no name for it. There was no need for one. This was fate. So the magic of the moment shouldn’t have been ruined by needless words.   
Two sets of blue eyes stayed locked for what felt like an eternity, then Daryl just gave a curt nod as if he meant to say “’kay, I see we are at one”. A gesture that was so entirely Daryl, that Rick couldn’t help smirking.   
A sappy scene would have the archer cringe, so he would always favor a pragmatic reaction, but the less emotions he displayed openly, the more of them were _there_ and needed to be hidden behind that deadpan façade. Rick knew him well enough to be totally aware of that and chose to give them both a way out, before the situation may have started to take an awkward turn.

        “Should we check the rooms upstairs now?” 

Again, Daryl just gave a curt nod, but the way his eyes hinted a smile showed, that he _knew._ Knew the intention behind Rick’s suggestion. Knew how the younger man felt for him and that he was well aware of Daryl’s feelings for him, too. Knew without needing any words.   
Silently they headed for the stairs, Rick taking up the lead once more with Daryl falling into step right behind him. They would live side by side and fight back to back, but when the situation required it, it would always be Rick taking the lead. An unspoken agreement that worked perfectly for both of them and required equal trust – maybe even more by the one in front to have their follower protect their back and not stab it. The way Shane had done. 

There were four more rooms upstairs – the master bathroom to the right of the stairs and a smaller adjoining bedroom, a linen closet in between of them, as well as two equally large bedrooms on the opposite side of the corridor.   
They peeked into all rooms once and then looked at each other in silent agreement.

        “That’s easy”, Daryl started, when Rick picked up and continued.

        “The kids get the rooms to the back.”

        “Judith the smaller one, Carl the larger one.”  
         
Rick nodded, gesturing towards the bedroom next to the stairs.

        “That’s ours, so whatever comes up these stairs …”

        “ … has to get past us first.” 

It was the oddest kind of conversation they had ever had, amplifying each other’s thoughts and ending the other’s sentences the way they just had, but they didn’t even take notice of it. Hadn’t it always been that way?

Rick stepped into the doorway of what was going to be his and Daryl’s room and looked around, although there wasn’t too much to see.   
Across from the door stood a comfortable looking queen-size bed, covered by a  colorful, clearly handmade quilt. There were two bedside tables with a small shade lamp on either one, a dresser with several drawers right next to the door and a wall closet to the right. No more. The adjoining room, Carl’s room, would no doubt be an exact mirror image of this one and Rick could vividly imagine the teenger pull a face -  before he would _remember._ Remember that those were not the old times anymore when they had had a fancy house in Georgia. This was the new world, where people were grateful to have a roof over their head at all and food on the table and never took either one for granted.    
Daryl’s hands on his shoulders from behind had the sheriff turn his head and cast his companion a side glance. 

        “Think it’ll do?” 

        “Ya kidding me? The past two years we’ve been sleepin’ on the ground for the most part – on concrete floors or grass with ants eating us alive or old, moulding hay that smelled like horseshit. This is a damn palace.” 

He pushed the other man gently into the room towards the bed.

        “C’mon. Lie down.” He shrugged, when he saw Rick cast him a surprised look. “Yer getting up earlier than them chickens lately and running yerself ragged for Deanna. Rome wasn’t built in a day, Alexandria ain’t, either.” 

Rick looked almost longingly at what appeared to be a very comfortable bed and he did need a break, Daryl was right, but … Wasn’t there always a ‘but’?

        “I’d love to, Daryl, but I still need to look at the other houses and Deanna …”

        “Rick.” 

The younger man fell quiet and stifled a laugh. Daryl’s way of saying his name in the familiar cut-the-crap-inflection had become so dear to him, that he secretly wondered, if he wasn’t doing or saying stupid things deliberately these days to prompt it. 

        “Aaron and I ain’t gonna bring new people in today, so them houses can wait till tomorrow. Alexandria ain’t gonna fall, because Rick Grimes is takin’ a break.”

He was right. Rick’s voice of reason, his conscience. Of course, he was right. 

Without any further complaints, Rick gave an affirmative nod and turned to his left, to head for the right side of the bed. They didn’t even have to talk about who was going to take up which side – it was logical. Rick was right-handed and needed easy access to his gun, that undoubtedly would be sitting on the bedside table at nights. Daryl needed both hands to wield the crossbow, so to him it didn’t matter.   
        Rick dropped onto the bed with a relieved sigh and stretched the tired and cramped up muscles in his legs and back, grateful for the break. He hadn’t realized how badly he had needed one. Daryl watched him with a smile from where he was still standing at the door, before he walked up to him and went about taking off Rick’s boots.  
         
        “I wouldn’t do that”, the sheriff warned him. “Been wearing those boots all day long. And it’s hot out there …”

        “Pfff, as if I gave a damn. If the flies fall off the wall, we at least got the vermin problem taken care of in this place.” 

Rick broke out laughing.

        “Two walkers with one bolt.” When Daryl looked at him with a smirk, he said: “Thought we needed to update one or the other saying.

        “Keep up with the times, huh?”

Daryl kicked off his own shoes and dropped onto the quilt next to Rick, turning onto his side to look at him. The younger man mirrored his motion and a moment later they lay looking at each other silently, simply indulging in the peace and quiet and each other’s presence. 

        “It’s Eric’s birthday today”, Daryl said unexpectedly.

When he didn’t give any explanation as to why he had mentioned this, Rick nodded and replied.

        “I know. Aaron mentioned it to me earlier. I’m surprised anybody even still knows the date at all. How did he keep track?”

        “He’s got a watch that shows the date. Aaron told me that shortly after the outbreak, he thought it to be extremely important to keep track – for the history books. So we would know when it started and … when it ended.”

There was a reaction in Rick’s eyes, that confirmed Daryl’s assumption that they were thinking the same thing and Rick even proved it, when he said with a sigh:

          “Eric’s an optimist, huh?“ He paused for a moment, then he added: “He’s right. We should all keep track and celebrate birthdays … Things like that are important. I don’t even know when Judith’s birthday is.”

        “Neither does she, so just pick a date. She’ll never know. And she wouldn’t mind, either, as long as we throw her a party and Carol’s got another reason for baking.” He couldn’t help rolling his eyes. 

Rick laughed about the remark, before he asked:

        “Why did you bring up Eric’s birthday?”

        “He invited me over. Said him and Aaron was gonna have a li’l _get-together_ with a couple of folks tonight.”

        “Sounds great.”

        “I said no.” He turned on his back and stared at the ceiling. “Started feeling like a fifth wheel and … they are so damn happy with each other. 'Twas gettin’ hard ta bear.”  

Rick didn’t reply to that, but he understood clearly what Daryl was telling him.   
Gently he inched closer and placed a tender kiss on the side of the archer’s head, before wrapping one arm over him. A gesture that was equally protective and supportive, whichever Daryl needed most in that moment. Rick kept quiet, simply lay like this and waited.  
The ball wasn’t in his court. Daryl had sent him a message, to which he had answered in gestures. Now it was up to the older man to make a decision and say out loud what he wanted.

        “I was thinkin’ about goin’ after all”, the archer said after a while.

There was another pause and Rick wondered, if he expected him to say anything. When he didn’t, Daryl added: “Wanna come?” 

Rick was impressed and surprised at the same time. He had wondered earlier, if Daryl would ever have said anything, would ever have found the courage to speak up.   
If it hadn’t been for Rick taking the initiative, they probably would never have moved into this house, would never have taken that final, essential step towards each other. They would have remained no more than friends, their feelings for each other buried for all times.   
And now, only few hours after Rick had dared to kick _this_ off, Daryl shot ahead like one of his arrows.   
If they went to that party together, they would go to that party _together._ There was no more pretending and Rick didn’t have the impression, that Daryl was even considering to go on pretending. If he had said _claimed_ , it wouldn’t have been more obvious – he wanted the world to know. If Rick agreed to accompany him, the cat would be out of the bag and they would be the talk of the town before the day had ended. Was Daryl even aware of that? Was this _really_ what he wanted?

Rick propped himself up on one elbow and looked down at Daryl, daring him to meet his eyes. Before he could even open his mouth, the archer said:

        “I know, what I’m asking.” 

A smile played around Rick’s lips. 

        “Good.”

And then he bent down and kissed Daryl. Without giving it another thought. Just because. It felt good. It felt _right._ And they both wanted it. They deserved no less.   
For a while the world outside their window was forgotten. Taste, smell, see, hear and feel - all of their senses were focussed onto the other man as they kissed each other, tenderly and passionately in turns, had their hands run over the other one’s body and breathed in each other’s scent. They explored and got to know each other in completely new ways.   
           When the sun started to set, they lay snuggled up, an entangled heap of arms and legs, while Rick slept peacefully in Daryl’s arms, his head placed on the archer’s shoulder. Daryl had his fingers fork slowly and tenderly through Rick’s curls, while he looked outside the bedroom window with a happy sparkle in his eyes.   
There were trees outside, the wind rustled in the leaves, birds were singing and the last rays of the setting sun sent a warm glow into the room. No wall. No cage. No more boundaries. He hadn’t felt this free in a long time – if ever. 

Soon he had to wake Rick, much that he would have loved to just lay here like this till the break of dawn.   
But they had a party to go to, a teenager and a toddler to look after and their gear to move over into this house. None of this could possibly wait till tomorrow, as far as Daryl was concerned.   
Fact of the matter was though, that they would probably wait with the move until Rick had had a chance to talk to Carl and explain the new, changed situation to him.   
        Daryl breathed in deep and released the air with a sigh. Carl’s reaction didn’t worry him, but he hated to think of another night in the small room that faced the  wall – alone. But as of tomorrow, he never had to spend another night without Rick.   
That thought alone brought a smile to his face again and the anticipation, the _promise_ of an entirely new life had his heart beat faster. He never thought, that he would see the day that something _good_ was happening to Daryl Dixon.  
Things would change. They already had. 

Rick started to stir as he woke and slowly opened his eyes. It took him a moment to remember where he was and why he was lying in Daryl’s arms, but the confused air was almost instantly replaced by a warm smile. When did _this_ even start to feel so right? Hadn’t they been just friends only this morning?   

          “Strange”, he said softly, while he looked at Daryl, ”but it feels as though it’s always been this way.” 

Daryl just looked at him, thinking “ _It has. At least for me.”_ He didn’t dare tell Rick that he had dreamed about holding the younger man in his arms like this for the longest time – maybe all of his life.

        “Lori used to say the same thing about her and I. We were so young when we met, fell in love, married, had a kid … It went rather fast, but she said it was fate. That we had done the exact same thing a thousand times before in former lives and that two souls that belonged together, would find each other in each new life. Because they were meant to.

        “Jeez, makes ya hope ya at least like that person, if you’re condemned ta run into the same jackass till kingdom comes.” 

Rick laughed out loud.

        “I take it, you don’t believe in fate?”

        “Nah. That means whatever we do, ‘s gonna play out according to some odd godly masterplan? Means we ain’t got no control over our own lives. Can’t make one single decision or stir that _fate_ in any way. Man, that sucks.” 

        “You wouldn’t _know_. Besides, I kinda like the idea that there’s a deeper meaning to things, a plan – no matter what. How else can you survive this world out there without going insane?”

        “Makes ya think ya was sane?” He flashed Rick the ghost of a smile. “Maybe we’re all plain nuts ta even try ta survive it. Besides, what terrific masterplan ya think is behind _this._ ” He waved his arm to the world outside the window.  
         
        “It’s not all bad.”

        “It ain’t? Ya haven’t been out there in a while, huh?”

        “Don’t have to. This world is in here just the same.” He looked deep into Daryl’s eyes and hugged him a little closer. “I wouldn’t have met you, if it wasn’t for this world.” 

He didn’t add anything else, but he almost heard the little wheels in Daryl’s head work.

        “Lemme process this. Ya saying our fate runs to some heavenly plan and souls that are meant to be together, always find one another. Did I get that right so far?” Rick nodded. “’Kay, that means, if you and I was part of that great plan, chances of us ending up together was pretty shitty before, since some douchebag messed up when handing out souls and had yers end up in a dude, who hadda become a cop, and mine was born into a redneck family on the other side of the law. Bad news, so the world hadda go ta hell for us ta end up in this bed together? Shit, man, so that crap out there is all our fault then? Dunno if I still wanna see ya, officer doom" 

Rick suppressed a laugh and brought his face closer to Daryl’s, a teasing sparkle in his eyes.

        “You don’t? Are you _sure_?” The tip of his nose touched Daryl’s. “I’d even let you gut your squirrels on the porch.”

        “That changes everything”, Daryl breathed with a raspy voice. “Can’t resist a man, who let’s me gut ma squirrels just _everywhere.”_   
His head came forward and his lips pressed so firmly to Rick’s, that it turned them around, with Rick ending up on his back and Daryl lying half on top of him. His fingers entangled in the curls he loved so much, as he kissed him ardently.

        “Wow”, Rick gasped, when they broke apart to breathe, “I had no idea the word _squirrel_ turns you on like that.” 

        “Ya ain’t seen nothin’ yet.” 

        “Promises, promises.”

Rick smiled at the other man teasingly, waiting for his reaction. There were shadows on Daryl’s face that made it impossible to read the expression in his eyes and in just that moment Rick realized that the sun had almost set. It was getting dark.  
He cast a glance outside the window and cursed under his breath.

        “It’s late. We gotta go back.” 

        “Spoilsport.”

Daryl tried to make it sound like a teasing remark, but Rick heard the regretful inflection underneath. 

        “I _know_.” He lifted a hand and cupped Daryl’s cheek gently for a moment. “But we got two kids to look after and have been gone far too long.”

        “ _We_ got two kids?” Daryl’s eyes had widened, which gave his face a way softer expression than usual. 

Rick pushed his hand against the archer’s chest, gently but insistently, to have Daryl give him some room to sit up. When he did, he shrugged and said:

        “Judith is already calling you _daddy_.”

        “She may be saying _Daryl_ after all.”

        “It doesn’t matter, _da’y._ Either way. You’ve been family to my kids for a long time and you proved to be qualified for that job more than once. So, if you want it …”

Daryl looked at him quietly for a moment, then he replied:

        “How’s payment?” 

Rick suppressed another smirk. 

        “Huh, let’s see. New house, new _mug_ , permission to gut animals on the front porch, a nightmare of a backyard there, Huckleberry, a cramped but cozy sleeping arrangement and lots of love.”

        “No cookies and casseroles?”

        “I’m afraid not.”

        “Deal.” 

He held out his fist to Rick with a sparkle in his eyes, while the younger man cast him an amused look.

        “Bro fist?”

        “What, ya rather wanna do _cross my heart and hope ta die_?”

Rick touched his fist to Daryl’s with a chuckle, before he swung his legs out of bed and got up. 

        “Come on, _bro_. Time to go.”   



	5. Chapter 5

Putting their shoes back on, smoothing the quilt on their bed and heading for the stairs, was done in total silence. They walked down the steps way slower than two people, who were in a hurry, as though their shoes were made of lead and when they stood outside on the porch, Daryl couldn’t help sighing audibly.    
There was a lump in his throat all of a sudden and he swallowed hard, fighting the cold feeling in the pit of his stomach. The feeling that these may have been the happiest hours he would ever have in this town and that neither him, nor Rick would ever return to this house. 

        _“Stop being paranoid”,_ he chided himself secretly. 

Surely this thought was born from the fact that so far nothing good had ever happened to him and he was afraid, that Rick may have been right. Maybe there _was_ a higher being who stirred their fate, and that someone might notice any second now, that Daryl Dixon was happy. A thing unheard of and probably not intended, and they may correct it all too soon and take it all away from him again. 

        _A life without fear, is a life without love._

That saying sure was right, because only people, who had no one to love, had no one to lose. As soon as your heart belonged to someone else, it was a heart not only filled with love, but fear as well. The feeling was alien to him and confused Daryl to some extent. He had never been afraid. Of what? He hadn’t had anything to prove and nothing to lose before. Yes, things had changed.

He cast Rick a sideglance, a sudden wave of fury washing over him.

          _“Don’t ya dare!”_ he sent a silent threat to whatever divine being messed with his fate. _“Dare harm him – or ma kids – and ya gonna have hell ta pay. Understood?”_

          “You okay?”

Rick’s concerned voice tore him out of his silent brooding and had him lock into the face he loved most in this world.

          “Yeah, I’m good.”

He breathed in deep once more and took another long look around him, as if he meant to memorize each little detail.  
There were two white rocking chairs sitting next to each other on the porch and for just a second Daryl couldn’t help the very mawkish and non-characteristic thought, that he would want to sit in those chairs with Rick for the next like thirty years, watching Judith and Carl grow up and come visit them once in a while with their own kids. The sappiness of that thought made him cringe just slightly and he couldn’t help hearing Merle’s voice in the back of his mind, that he was gonna shove his head down the toilet, if he didn’t stop that right now.  
          Daryl’s lips twitched just slightly at the memory of his brother and he quickly pushed it back into that very special corner of his mind, that was reserved exclusively for Merle. The older Dixon may have been a poor excuse for a brother and a total jackass, but Daryl had loved him nevertheless.

          “Ya know, this porch is way ta nice ta gut squirrels here. Think I’m gonna take ‘em into the _nightmare of a backyard_ instead.”

Rick looked at him surprised and arched an eyebrow.

          “Whatever. It’s your call.”

With a thoughtful air Daryl turned to Rick the next moment and asked:

          “Yer okay with me still goin’ out there huntin’ at all?”

          “That’s entirely up to you, Daryl. I know, you love being out there and you don’t need my permission – you’re not one of my kids, you’re my … partner.” He cocked his head, a gesture that had become familiar and dear to Daryl. “Besides, I think, you’re about the only one, who’s going about things the right way.”

He placed one hand on the archer’s shoulder and squeezed gently, before giving it a pat, prompting Daryl to walk with him back to the other house. For a moment they walked quietly side by side, then Rick picked up.

          “I know, the others are giving you a hard time about not doing your share and wasting time going on useless hunting trips.”

Daryl’s expression darkened.

          “How d’ya know?”

          “One or the other approached me and, well, sort of … complained.”

The older man balled his hands to fists, in the dusk unnoticed by Rick, and his reply was close to being a growl.

          “That so?”

Rick stopped dead in his tracks and placed a soothing hand on Daryl’s arm, stopping him as well.

          “Hey, I said one or the other approached me with that, I didn’t say I agreed. As a matter of fact, it’s like I said – you‘re the only one going about things the right way. Everybody is getting way too comfortable here. And too careless. They’ve let down their guard and they are taking all this here for granted, as though these walls mean guaranteed safety. They forgot what happened to Hershel’s farm and the prison, while you’re the only one, who’s still alert, still training your skills.”

He proceeded down the street with Daryl by his side, displaying a dark expression of his own now.

          “As of tomorrow, I’m gonna put an end to this. Everybody is gonna go back to target practice and close combat training. I want them to be alert again at any time.” He sighed audibly. “This place could go up in flames, too, one day, and I want our group to be prepared.”

          “We need ta be prepared in case Alexandria falls. And we need ta be prepared in case it ain’t.”

Rick cast a questioning glance to the side and Daryl added:

          “Living inside these walls ain’t any easier than out there. They are right takin’ care of them vegetable plants and pigs. We gonna need ‘em just as much as target practice.

The younger man gave a thoughtful nod in agreement. Whenever two opposing parties persisted in their point of view, the golden rule was somewhere in between.

          “So, what you’re saying is, that all of us best do our share and practice in all sections – fighting and gardening alike, so to speak.”

Daryl gave an affirmative nod, which prompted another smirk on Rick’s face.

          “You _sure_?”

          “Don’t look at me, Grimes. I ain’t pampering no tomatoes. Been feeding them pigs already. If ya want me to, I can teach them greenhorns some huntin’ and tracking.”

Rick cast him another glance and smiled inwardly. It didn’t sound like much, but offering to take these _greenhorns_ out with him into his precious woods to teach them skills he treasured and took pride in, was a major step for Daryl and the offer hadn’t been voiced lightly.

          “Good thought. I appreciate that, Daryl.”

For a while they walked silently next to each other, than the archer said unexpectantly:

          “If I haven’t done ma share … 'twas, because I didn’t see a reason to.”

No explanation was added, but Rick understood him perfectly well and a cold feeling settled in the pit of his stomach.     
Another moment in silence passed, then he asked gingerly:

          “Have you thought about leaving?”

          “Yeah.” Daryl stopped when he heard Rick suck in the air. “But I wouldn’t have. Not without you. And Carl and the li’l asskicker.” He started walking again and then added quietly: “Thanks.”

          “For what?”

          “Giving me a reason _not_ ta think about leaving anymore.”

The cold feeling dissolved.

          “My pleasure.”

          “It will be”, Daryl answered with a teasing inflection, grinning inwardly.

 

When they entered the house, it was dark and quiet, save for a white flickering light in the family room and someone singing.

The two men looked at each other with wide eyes.

          “Is that a TV?”

          “Ssshh.” Rosita’s soft hush from the couch had Rick fall quiet and walk over to her instead, Daryl on his heels. When they stood next to her, she added in a whisper:  
          “Eugene got the old video recorder running and we even found a few tapes that still work.”

Daryl cast a glance at the screen and pulled a face.

          “Mary Poppins? That what ya call fun?”

          “Well, excuse me”, she hissed, spreading both of her arms and gestured at the other two occupants of the couch, “but _The Chainsaw Massacre_ wasn’t really suitable.”

Only now the eyes of the two men had adjusted to the twilight enough to take a closer look at the scenario that played out before them. Rosita sat in the middle of the couch, one arm wrapped around Eugene, who was snuggled up to her right side, his head rested on her shoulder and fast asleep. And her other arm around little Judith, who lay to her left, her head rested in her lap, equally fast asleep.  
Both men couldn’t help grinning.

          “Having fun there, guys?” She shot them a scowl, before gesturing at the TV. “If she says _supercalifragilisticexpialidocious_ one more time, I’m gonna scream. Besides, I need to take a … er, need to go to the bathroom. Urgently. And – You. Are. Late.”

Rick suppressed a chuckle, while he bent down to lift his daughter off of her lap.

          “Sorry about that. I really appreciate you taking care of Judith.”

          “No problem”, she said softer now.

She cast Daryl a glance, while she struggled to push Eugene off her shoulder, and saw the archer raise his hands defensively.

          “Don’t look at me, chica. That big kid there is all yers.”

She turned her head and looked at the man by her side, muttering something to herself that sounded suspiciously like “I sure hope so”.

Rick and Daryl just looked at each other with a knowing smile.

          “Do you know where Carl is?” Rick asked her, while she worked herself gently out of Eugene’s embrace, _not_ screaming, although Mary just sang another enthusiastic _supercalifragilisticexpialidocious._

          “He’s up in his room reading comics, I think.”

That said, she jumped to her feet after having detached Eugene successfully, and almost ran from the room.

          “If ya gotta go, ya gotta go”, Daryl commented drily, while Rick suppressed another chuckle.

He tenderly stroked the soft curls of the little girl, who resumed her slumber on his shoulder, and then slowly walked out to the front porch, never doubting for a second that Daryl would accompany him without him even asking.

The night was warm and a full moon was rising to the crickets playing their tune. A perfect cliché. It could have been idyllic and peaceful, but these days it never was anymore. Deep inside of everybody there was always the uneasy feeling of lurking danger. And no matter how idyllic and peaceful a moment was, the terrible stench of death seemed to be ever present. They would all have to learn to live with that.

        “Still wanna go to that party?” Rick asked softly.

        “Sure. Don’t you?””

        “I’m just gonna put Judith to bed and tell Carl to keep an eye …”

He fell quiet with an almost shocked expression, while Daryl arched an eyebrow.

        “Ya wasn’t really gonna say _that_ to him, huh?”

        “Damn”, Rick cursed, torn between shock and amusement about this unintentional pun. 

        “Man, here ya finally come up with a pun that’s actually funny and ya can’t even laugh about it. Fate’s a bitch, huh?”

        “Ah, shut up”, Rick grumbled, while he elbowed the archer.

He turned to go back into the house and do as he had planned, when Daryl’s voice behind him had him stop.

        “Ya gonna tell Carl?” 

Rick nodded without turning.

        “No sense in postponing the inevitable.”

        “Uh, sounds like ya was on yer way ta face a firing squad.”

Now Rick turned around after all, while he pulled in a deep breath.

        “Just a little nervous about his reaction. Aren’t you?”

        “No.” Daryl shook his head. “That kid killed his first walkers before he grew hair on his balls. He’s way ahead of his age and mature enough ta handle this.”

A smile tugged at the corners of Rick’s mouth.

        “Elegantly expressed as usual, Mr. Dixon.” 

        “Ya want ma opinion or rhetoric lessons? If ma way of talking ain’t good enough, go see if Eugene’s still up for grabs.”

        “He’s not”, a female voice sounded from behind the screen door, “and will you two keep it down? He’s asleep.”

        “Why don’t ya go tell Mary ta shut up then and not us?” Daryl shot back, angry about the Latina obviously having eavesdropped on them. 

Rick looked over his shoulder and watched her walk away with swinging hips, snorting a sassy “Pfff” on leaving. Turning back around and pecking Daryl’s mouth was one flowing motion and caught the archer completely off guard. 

        “I don’t want Eugene and I give a damn about rhetorics. And you’re right. I’m gonna go talk to Carl now. You wanna come?” 

        “No. That’s a conversation ya should have with him alone.” 

        “Daryl, I thought, I made this clear – you’re family. Have been for the longest time. And he’s …”

        “Rick. – It’s one thing ta let the boy know that I’m more than a friend to ya now. It’s another ta expect _him_ ta see more than a friend in me. That’ll take time and I don’t want ta force things by being there now when ya drop the bombshell.” 

The younger man looked at his partner in awe. Time and again Daryl surprised him and for a moment Rick wondered, if he would ever see the day this would stop and he had seen all of Daryl Dixon’s colors. Somehow he doubted that. 

 

Later that night they sat shoulder to shoulder in their usual spot of the porch, accompanied by the squirrels Daryl had left there that afternoon.   
It was past midnight, Alexandria lay quiet, bathed into the silvery light of the full moon, and for the most part fast asleep, save for the sentries on duty and one or the other resident, who hadn’t found sleep yet. Like Rick and Daryl.   
        They had been at Eric’s party and for someone, who for the most part hated _get-togethers_ like this, Daryl had had a marvellous time. Maybe because for the first time in his life, he hadn’t been _the outsider_ , the one who was alone and didn’t fit in, felt lost amongst all those happy couples. All of a sudden he belonged, and it felt good.   
They hadn’t made a big announcement. Hadn’t really _told_ anyone the news that they were a couple now. Somehow it must have shown, for only half an hour after they had appeared on his and Eric’s doorstep, Aaron had secretly pulled Daryl aside and had said “I’m happy for you”. No more. Just that. But what else was there to say? And when they left shortly before midnight, Denise had given Daryl that extra tight hug. Actually the first hug between them ever and had winked at him, before she had taken Tara’s hand and the two women had headed home to the infirmary. 

        “Tara gave me a bro fist”, Rick had commented flabbergasted, which had Daryl actually laugh out loud. Maybe that, too, was a first in his life. 

Daryl had been right about Carl. The boy had been speechless at first, his jaw hitting the ground when his dad had revealed to him – not without actually blushing – that there was someone in his life again. That he was in love and happy and planning to have them move together to another house the next day. It had taken Carl a moment to figure out, whom his father was even talking about. He hadn’t seen him around any of the women particularly often and in the end, this only left one single explanation. 

        “Daryl?!”

The way the color of his father’s ears had changed instantly, was all the answer the teenager needed. Any other boy may have been upset or angry or repulsed, but it had actually taken no more than a few seconds for Carl to realize, that he wasn’t even overly surprised. Somehow he had seen this coming for the longest time.   
Even while his mom was still alive, it had been Daryl Rick had turned to when he needed to talk, needed someone to listen, needed support and advice, just _needed_ somebody.   
He may have been just a kid, but he had felt that magnetic field between his father and the archer, that was pulling the two men toward each other. It had been there ever since the day they first met.   
Lori used to talk about fate, about souls that were meant to be together and that would find each other, no matter what. She had even made a bedtime story about this, so Carl would remember and never stop looking for that other soul that was the counterpart to his own. Sometimes Carl wondered, how chances of ever finding that special someone were these days, with apparently more dead than living people walking the face of the Earth.   
Even though Lori was so convinced about her theory, in the end she must have made a mistake. Had deluded herself and confused attraction and a mere crush with the love she was looking for. Rick had never been that special someone meant to be with her – that was Shane. She had realized that too late, set off an avalanche of doom, that couldn’t be stopped anymore at the time. Carl hoped, that his mom’s and Shane’s souls had found each other wherever they were now.   
If Lori was right with her theory about a divine masterplan, it was in fact fate that his dad had met Daryl. Anyone who looked closely enough could see, that they complimented each other as perfectly as two matching pieces of a jigsaw puzzle.   
Why shouldn’t he be okay with that? What _right_ did he even have to not be okay with that?  
In the end, Carl had decided that he had considered Daryl family for the longest time. He had saved Judith’s life, had been there for him after his mom’s death, when his dad was unable to, and in a way, Carl had seen another father in Daryl for years. So it didn’t make any difference now that the two men took their friendship a step further and were officially a couple.   
Before Rick had been about to change color again from red to blue, due to lack of oxygen, because he was holding his breath while eagerly waiting for his son to say anything, Carl had just shrugged and said:

        “Cool, dad. Fine with me. Can I read my comic now?” 

That had been the tremendous father-son-conversation. But then, not every major event called for a speech. Sometimes few words said it all. 

Daryl clinked his beer bottle to Rick’s before taking a swig.   
When Rick had come back from his _conversation_ with Carl and had told him about it, Daryl had barely been able to refrain from laughing. And he still had to stifle a laugh now. He didn’t want to rub it in, but in a way Carl was more his son than Rick’s already – at least as far as the volume of words he considered necessary for a conversation was concerned.   
Rick took a swig of his own and then glanced at his watch.

        “Past midnight. Another busy day ahead.” He couldn’t help sighing.

        “Told ya before, there’s no reason ya should do all the heavy lifting. I’m gonna give ya a hand.”

Rick nudged his shoulder gently.

        “I appreciate the offer, but I doubt dealing with Deanna and all those schedules, organizing shifts …”

        “Hey, said I was gonna give ya a hand, not letting Deanna torture me in yer stead. It’s gotta stop somewhere, Grimes.” 

Rick laughed lightly.

        “Well, what exactly do you intend _to give me a hand with_ , huh?”

Daryl cast him a side glance.

        “Yer not tryin’ ta talk dirty ta me here, do ya?”

        “Nah”, Rick smirked, “was just wondering.”

        “Yeah, ya best keep on doing that.”

Once more Rick elbowed him with a suppressed laugh, then he took another swig from his beer and looked out into the night. If Daryl wanted to explain just what he had had in mind, he would do it of his own accord. There was no use in pushing him.  
As if to confirm his assumption, Daryl picked up in right that moment.

        “Ain’t no good at administration crap or singin’ lullabies to veggies, but I got two hands ta work with. – Ya had a plan back at the prison. A _vision._ Remember?”

Almost instantly tears shot into Rick’s eyes and he swallowed hard to force them back.

        “How could I forget”, he choked out.

Daryl reached out and got hold of his hand. He interlaced their fingers and gave a gentle squeeze, while he continued:

        “Don’t see why that vision shoulda gone up in flames along with the prison. I still remember. And so do you. 'Twas a good plan for that place, and it’s a good plan for this one as well.”

Slowly Rick turned his face to him and looked at him questioningly, his eyes suspiciously shiny.

        “First thing, as soon as them chickens are up”, Daryl continued, “I’m gonna go find some paint in this town, so the li’l asskicker is gonna get the nursery we planned for her back then. And then I’m gonna put an end ta half of the guys in town just playing pocket pool and put ‘em ta work ta build them swings and the sandpit ya wanted. The kids in this town deserve ta have a place ta play – our daughter first of all. Apocalypse my ass. She’s gonna have a better childhood than I had. All of them.”

The next moment Rick’s lips on his silenced him, as the younger man kissed him ardently, while a tear ran down his cheek. He wrapped his arms around Daryl and pulled him close, his face buried in the crook of the archer’s neck.

        “I promised Carl a new world”, he said softly. “And I intend to keep that promise. We’re gonna build it together. You and I.”

        “Yeah, with lots of help. Ain’t gonna do all the dirty work again.” 

That remark brought a smile back to Rick’s face, but instead of pulling back, he snuggled up to Daryl even further with a content sigh. Daryl took one last swig from his beer, before placing the bottle next to him and lifting Rick’s from his lover’s hand to do likewise. He felt the lean body in his arms grow heavy and limp, while Rick drifted off. For a second Daryl considered waking him to turn in, but then he changed his mind.   
He always favored this spot over any place in this house and he was never going to sleep in that cage of a room again. The stars were out, it was warm and peaceful out here and Rick was soundly asleep in his arms. Why destroy something that was perfect the way it was?   
In a few hours the sun would come up. A new day, a brighter future. He would have a home and a family for the first time in his life.   
He placed a tender kiss on Rick’s curls, before he leaned back against the railing and closed his eyes. The new world was near and he could hardly wait.     
               

  
_Nowhere man, don't worry_   
_Take your time; don't hurry_  
_Leave it all_  
_Till somebody else lends you a hand_   


**Notes for the Chapter:**

>   
>   
> 
>  
> 
> _I found this wonderful drawing and the lines along with it somewhere in the internet, tumblr I think. It's not mine, but it matches perfectly and I just wanted you guys to see it._
> 
>  
> 
>  _I'd love to give credit, but I'm afraid I don't know, who made it. But thanks to the wonderful artist. If it's yours and you don't appreciate it being here, drop me a line and I'Il take it down immediately._  
>   
> 
> I hope, you liked the story. There is a sequel called "BET YA", which I will be posting as soon as I'm done re-reading and editing. 
> 
> Thanks a lot for reading and leaving kudos and comments! So cool. You got no idea how so cool that is. LoL


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